Sustaining Relationships

Over the weekend I was attending a function where my sister and her family were also present.

During the function my sister approached me and said that her 3 year old daughter had just declared to her the following, ‘You need to meet your brother as you love him like I love my sister.’

These direct words cut a clean direction for the way we all should see the relationships between family and friends.

I was impressed with the innocence and profoundness of the sentiment expressed.
It was from the heart, unclouded, unjudged and pure.

In the USA the hugely popular Oprah show has yielded great successes for regular experts and guests. For example, Oprah’s guest Doctor: Dr Phil. The Doctor now has his own successful TV programme.

A look through Dr Phil’s site reveals some interesting information and practical advice on building a range of personal relationships.
Visit to discover useful guides on:

What Impression do You Make?
Helping Your Child Succeed In The World
Keeping the Peace in Your Extended Family
Overcoming Your Competitive Nature

For example, in the latter section he suggests…Live true to your authentic self.
Discover who you really are, and accept yourself. “You don’t need to compare yourself to somebody else to be able to look in the mirror and be proud of who you are,” Dr. Phil explains. Remember that you are an individual, and people will form an opinion about you based on your own actions, not how you compare to someone else.”

I wondered if this concept of being, ‘true to oneself, respecting others and considering that we are only here on this Earth for a short period is lost amongst the need and desperation to survive?

Often people are chasing the treasure of their rainbows rather than valuing what they have in front of them. Could it be that our temptation to perform against each other keeps us in the dark about the opportunities to progress on both a spiritual and self-less manner?

To help resolve family issues, Dr Phil suggests that… sometimes relationships need a hero. That means someone has to step up and be the bigger person to close the gap.
Someone has to make the first move, the first compromise, to heal the relationship.
Swallow your pride and be that person. Think about what the future holds if you do not mend this.

Although much of what is suggested appears to be obvious, as time passes wounds can deepen and before one knows it life has passed everyone by. Time runs out for redemption or keeping the peace. I have seen episodes where once good friends can stop talking to each other permanently.The pain this causes is not shown on the surface but underneath in the soul.

Recently a friend of mine did not realise that my innocent and unawareness of lack of communication was causing him issues, I had lost his emails in my SPAM box! Eventually his ‘pot boiled over’ and it was a shock to me about how serious he thought the situation had become. Luckily we managed to clear the air and accept that we both needed to improve our associated reliabilities.

Like my niece’s attitude I should have valued the relationship as something that was worth keeping in tact regardless of any noise or distractions.

Categories: 2008, Relationships, Spirtuality

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